Edith Buller-Breer
“The opinions expressed by the Tabor College EML student bloggers and those providing comments are theirs alone, and do not reflect the opinions of Tabor College. Tabor College is also not responsible for the accuracy of any of the information in the post.”
Relationships are something we all have. Some work well; others don’t. For many years, most of my relationships were strained because I did not know how to live in joy.
When I became acquainted with an organization called Life Model Works (www.joystartshere.com), I learned that joy means someone is delighted to be with me. Joy means I’m the sparkle in someone’s eye.
When I first heard that joy is someone delighting in me, I did not understand what that meant. I had no idea what they were talking about so I decided to do an experiment. I determined that for three months, I would look at peoples’ eyes to see if they sparkled when they saw me.
During the three months, I was often tempted to begin examining whether I was glad to be with someone, but I chose not to take on that task. Instead, I continued to concentrate on how others looked at me.
At the end of the three months, I had a clear understanding of what joy meant. I could tell when someone was tickled to see me. Their eyes revealed their heart. Some people were very joyful when they saw me. Others had less delight and some people’s eyes did not sparkle at all.
From this short experiment, I learned
- what joy is
- I need eye-to-eye contact
- joy can grow
- joy feels good
Knowing what joy means has helped transform my relationships. I try harder to look people in the eyes. When I fail to look a person in the eye, I am unable to receive their joy.
Joy can grow as people share their delight in each other. I love to look at babies. My joy smiles seem to come from deep inside when I look at them. If they smile back at me, I feel even more joy.
Experiencing joy feels really good. When I am at the airport, I love to watch people, especially children. I can see the joy of a child as they run to reunite with a loved one. Their joy makes me happy too. Joy also feels good when I see a friend I haven’t seen in a long time.
If you are puzzled by the idea that someone delights in you, try my experiment. Or join me for some Life Model Works classes our church offers (www.gcc-online.org). You can also find Life Model Works classes near you by checking out their map (http://www.thrivingrecovery.org/Locations/).